Down But Not Out

I am in a funk right now, but that does not mean I am down for good. It just makes me want it even more. If life gives you a lump of coal, why not make it a diamond?

Things are in a down position in life for me right now. I have put so much energy into this site and so much time into the One. They are the things that matter to me the most. If it was not for the One I would not even be here. I can’t really share about the One, but know they inspired me to go for it, no matter how down I got. They opened my eyes to what a dream is. They helped me make my dream a reality. I say that if someone in your life affects its course and you believe in them, then go with what your heart tells you.

I have put down laps, hot laps, and bled my soul on here for all of you. I want to do more for those that suffer from substance abuse and depression. Life is too short — we only get one, so why not take the chance and really live it?

We are not here to work and never see our dreams come true. If you believe, then you can achieve. Winning is not the goal but rather being a success in your life, whatever that looks like to you. Be a success on your rides or whatever your passion is. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. It only matters what you think. The One taught me this these past few months — whatever is getting me down, it never gets to me when I talk to them.

I pedal ’cause it’s my therapy, I pedal ’cause it’s who I am. And I write this blog for all of you to let you know you will never be alone. I am not and nor should you be. So on this I say, when the downs hit, fight back. And have hope no matter what — say that you can instead of you can’t. Giving up is not an option, even though sometimes it feels like the only solution. Just remember that there is always someone out there who has been where you are and has gotten back up. We are meant to really live our lives. So on that I say thank you to the One, and go out and RAMFB.

Hot Lap

So today I got in a hot lap. Trying to break the under-an-hour.

Every time I go out there, something is on my mind to drive me to do it. I had two really good falls, but that did not stop me. I am just 1 minute and some seconds from getting it. I know I can do it ’cause “I can’t” ain’t gonna happen.

I have a heavy heart these days, but to pedal like I am doing means I am only getting stronger. I may not ever be able to get the times of Mike King or Will Murray, but damnit, I will try. It always seems like anything I do in my life is a competition — not against others but against myself. I know “I can” is better than giving up. I know the lines, I know the trail. I know I can.

Today humidity played a part, but I knew I had to hydrate and breathe slow. Breathing too fast wastes your energy. The idea is to breathe slow and feel the trail and feel the pull of the wheels, mainly your front tire. I see some go out (I am guilty of it too, but I have been doing this for a minute now) and just rush into it without knowing the lines. I love a virgin trail, but that is only because the sk8ter in me feels it. The flow of the lines. I look ahead of the trail and see where I am going and follow my instincts.

I know I will break an hour on an 11-mile loop. I feel like I’ve done it before — but with gears. Now I am on a single speed, and that makes a huge difference ’cause every pedal I have to earn it. Mash it. Destroy it. SS is a different element. Either you take the suffering or go home. I choose to take the suffering.

Life is just a river flowing — and you have to navigate it if you want to get in. But only you can do it. You got this, I got this. Now today go out there and do your thing and own it. RAMFB.

Today

Today go out there with purpose to do what you need to do. Go out and just do your thing in this crazy thing called life. Allow the wheels to roll forward. Today is a day for new beginnings and letting go of yesterdays gone past. Go toward the next day and remember that no hill is too tall for you to climb, no stream is tough enough to cross. We go through things sometimes that make you question what life is even about. So we get on our bikes or boards and just go to clear our heads and try to figure it out. (Coffee works, too.)

In my life I am having to make the most difficult choice I have ever made — but I know I can do it. I will stand strong and I will roll forward. I have been kinda going through a lot these past 7 months and the only thing that seems to keep my sanity is my bike or bikes. Yes n One. Why have one when you can have as many as you want?

So today I will ride a motherfucking bike and get my head where I need it to be, right here with all of you. This is a short post, but that is all it needs to be. Live, Love, and RideaMotherFuckingBike.

Have a great week, and yes the shirts will be in my hands once again sometime this week. Don’t give up on me yet. Keep the wheels rolling forward and upright, rubber side down. RAMFB.

Break

Sometimes we just need to take a break from things, like work or life in general. I sometimes step away from what might be happening in my life, especially when it comes to personal things. I have to sit back and look at what is happening at the time and also in my life up to that point. When things are hard it sometimes feels like it would be easier to just run and hide — but the reality is that it’s better to face whatever is happening head on.

For instance, riding my bike. It is therapy for my problems. But it doesn’t fix them, it just puts them into a different perspective. I am inspired by so many people, I forget that I also kinda inspire others. My problems may be small in comparison to yours. I can’t complain really. I keep the wheels rolling forward and just do my thing.

I have taken breaks from riding for like a week or so, and when I get back on the bike I always feel better. I thought maybe I was pushing myself too hard. Sometimes I feel like I can’t reach that goal — but I can try to. I just build myself up to what I feel on the inside.

When the negative hits me, it hits hard like a brick going through glass. It shatters my belief in myself. In all honesty I have walked away too many times from what has gone on in my life and not faced my problems ’cause I didn’t have a tool to fight back with. I felt depleted, not worthy, and always thought “Who am I to trying to be?” Now I know who I am: I am a cyclist, a skateboarder, and a hard ass worker (who works way too much). But first and foremost, I am a dad and a brother and a son. I am who you all are; I am human and I make mistakes, we all do. It happens, it really does. It’s called life.

Riding a bike has changed my life so much. I can believe in myself now. It never lets me give up. I am always striving to be better than I was — yesterday, today, and tomorrow. We all can. Breaks are just a part of it. I get it. When it feels like you’re just going through the motions, keep the wheels rolling forward and upright. Take a break for a second and figure out what makes you happy. And for what was not making you happy, grab your bike and go out and just motherfucking ride it. I love what we do and we all do it well, regardless. This is all about the one. “Don’t give up” Peter Gabriel…RAMFB.